How to Overcome Internet Pornography Addiction

Here are the necessary steps to overcome an addiction to pornography. Though the title is labeled “Internet Pornography” these steps would of course work for any kind of pornography. Though not meant to be a comprehensive plan I believe this plan covers the essentials while allowing you to adjust it to your personal situation and level of addiction. Keep in mind this is more of a self-help plan and does not address outside support. With that in mind if you feel you need additional help then coaching or therapy may be necessary to give you the boost you need.

1. Have a Strong Desire
“Desire is the starting point of all achievement, not a hope, not a wish, but a keen pulsating desire which transcends everything.” – Napoleon Hill. Without a strong desire, the process of change will be half-hearted and produce little results. Even if you can no more than desire to have a strong desire, you are headed in the right direction.

2. Make a Commitment.
After you have a strong desire you need to commit to the process. Change is a process, and the first step to creating change is committing yourself to the process. If you yourself are not committed then there is no course, program, or instruction that will create changes for you. Make a commitment to your success today!

3. Belief and Identity – You can longer identify yourself as your weakness or mistakes. Think of a strong role model and model your own identity after that person. If you find yourself talking or thinking negatively about yourself then stop and say or think the opposite. You must retrain your brain otherwise your low self-esteem will lead you right back to addiction. Forgive yourself and move on. Your future is spotless; so tie yourself to your potential instead of your past. Visualize the new you. You are not defined by porn addiction .

4. Identify the Cause not the Symptoms – The symptom is viewing pornography. The cause is whatever thoughts or feelings are leading you to see pornography as an escape and a solution for the uncomfortable or painful feelings you have.

a. The Void – Something inside is missing. Maybe you were hurt as a child or you are still recovering from a broken relationship. Perhaps you feel lonely or bored. Whatever it is, you are not feeling at peace or content and pornography has made it worse. If you find it too difficult to figure out what the root cause is then therapy may be necessary.
b. Thoughts and Feelings – Slow down and become more aware of the thoughts and feelings you have when you are tempted. Try to recognize the feelings you are trying to escape through pornography. Once you recognize these feelings you can begin to change them by changing the thoughts associated with these feelings

5. Set small manageable goals – Do not set a goal by saying “I want to be free from pornography in one week.” First of all this is probably unrealistic depending on the severity of you addiction. Second of all this is more of a target or result instead of a goal. You need to set small goals that will accumulate until the desired result is achieved. Accomplishing small goals will give you the initial confidence and momentum you need to keep this process going. You may even have to break your goals down into hours. The destination of success will be reached one step at a time or one small goal at a time.

6. Identify the times of biggest temptation
a. People – You may have to choose new friends if they are not going to live by your new standards
b. Places – Where the temptation is strongest such as the magazine rack in the grocery store or places with unrestricted access to the internet

7. Adjust your environment – If your pornography addiction is severe enough you may have to make some tough sacrifices. If you cannot stop looking at porn at work and there is no way to fix that then you may have to find another job or train into a new occupation. If the internet at home is a problem then get some monitoring software or get rid of the internet if it is still too difficult to resist.

8. Control your thoughts – Read the article “What Controls Your Attention Controls You

9. Replace your old life with a new life – If you have spent your hours, days, and weeks viewing pornography then it is time to put new things in its place. Get out of the house, find a new life hobby or an old neglected one, exercise in your free time. Create some kind of blog on what you’re passionate about so you have something productive to do at work on the computer. You must replace the old with new or there will be a void that will cause you to fall back into addiction.

10. Renew your inner strength and motivation every day – If you are religious then read the scriptures or religious books of hope. If you are not religious then read motivating books like “Chicken Soup for the Soul”. Whatever you choose make sure it is not giving you some misleading, quick fix, self help advice that will take you off the road of steady progression. You need to renew your inner strength on a daily basis to maintain a positive attitude and motivation to keep going.

11. Persevere – Do not expect perfection and do not get mad because you are vulnerable to tempting situations. Every time you slip-up, get up. You are never failing so long as you are persevering. If you give up after making a mistake then you are no longer progressing. Keep track of your progress in a journal and on a calendar somehow so you can see your progress. Success is inevitable so long as you persevere. You may have to restart hundreds of times but every time you restart you are that much closer to complete freedom.

12. Reward yourself – Take joy in reaching your goals and resisting temptation. At the end of each day write down your success for the day and give yourself a pat on the back. Learn to take joy in you new life you have decided on. As you do this you will have gradually less desire to return to your old life. Find joy in every day by deciding to have the right attitude and using your passions and talents to contribute to others and the world.

More motivating quotes by Napoleon Hill-
• “Perseverance: The majority of men meet with failure because of their lack of persistence in creating new plans to take the place of those that fail.”
• “What you think, so you will become.”
• “Every adversity carries with it the seed of an equivalent or greater benefit.”
• “Thoughts mixed with definiteness of purpose, persistence, and a burning desire are powerful things.”

Popular Post –>Top Ten Books that have Helped me Overcome Addiction

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3 Steps to Overcome Porn

Helps with:

  • Porn Addiction
  • Masturbation Addiction
  • Sexual Addiction
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66 thoughts on “How to Overcome Internet Pornography Addiction

  1. What I have read of this article–”Pornography and masturbation Addiction” [P & M problem] makes sense to me. What is the connection? I am Roman Catholic. Who put all of these good ideas together–or does everyone have to stay anonymous except guys like me that write a message? Can I presume the names of authors would be actual or replacement names– Nom de plume? No answer on this last question would mean everyone is not out in the open. Of course, I am already a scandal.

    I have tried to start a group based on the 12 step method and am willing to try again, and again, and again. I also want to do some writing on the problem. I have had a pornography / masturbation problem sense adolescence hit circa 1952. I am 68 years old.

    I view as many things–physical relief, erection aide, pleasure giver, sleep aide, temptation, a doorway to hell, path to seeking females other than my wife [she has cut me off on affection years ago, 1987--some obvious affairs by her have happened with other men, one is going on right now]. She has always refused marriage counseling. I would prefer a Catholic advisor, preferably a Roman Catholic priest if your organization is related to the Church–at the very least a lay person that is a longtime and fully practicing the Roman Catholic faith.

    I think it was Freud who said “Life is a problem for everbody.” Confucius would have answered Freud with “A long journey begins with the first step!” I have taken that “first step” many time in my life and intend to keep trying.

    Lately I have been clean for a year at a time, then I enthusiastically go on a binge for about a week–which sometimes leads me very close to seeking [but so far not actually doing it] the comfort of another woman.

    Stay with God,

    Hank

    Hank

  2. I think that with so many self-help ideas out there, trying to help people be sexually healthy and happy, we so often fail to state that nearly every sexual broken place stems from an emotional broken place. I really believe, and have taken the steps myself to prove this, that if we become honest with ourselves, and identify the areas where we have need in our own lives, emotionally, we will find that filling these areas will make us successful in re-programming our habits and thought patterns when we are tempted to delve into pornography or masturbation.

    This way, I have a reson to be whole.

    Chris

  3. i have always been wondering whether watching porn is good or bad to ur health?? i have realized tht it does effect ur overall nervous and physical system. i used to control myself from watching porns and had a very comfortable life as i did my studies easily and got distinction. but since last year it has been otherway round as i started watching porns and got all sorts ov problems. th article describe best way to restrict urself from watching porns. i did these things before and i am thankful for reminding me to stop it now.

  4. I would like to thank you for this website. A pornography and masturbation addiction has been ruining my life, and you have started me on the road to recovery. I am an excellent student (15 years old), I am very religious, and I love my family, but since I started I have been miserable, depressed, and isolated from everything that I love. I sincerely hope that I may soon recover from this horrible habit.

  5. To be truthful, I look at porno just because I was extremely horny and depress. I have a girlfriend and it seems she wants to have phone sex with me constantly. so i look at these honeys to get a glimpse of what to do. These steps will help me to get rid of my temptation.

  6. i am 21 & i have been struggling with these addictions too.I have had 2 big-time goofups with a couple of girls i really loved,and yeah-that’s where the ‘void’ part comes in.I tried hard for 3 years to crack IIT-JEE(toughest engineering entrance exam in the world) but failed & since then i have been suffering,i am having various digestive problems & constipation too.I think i am at an advance stage of depression.My parents are unaware of my problems,i come from a family of limited means-i can’t afford to visit doctors.There’s a lot of pressure on me as i have to clear the placement tests as well as finish my engineering projects,semester exams-so that i can get a gr8 job and support my family.I am already under my education loan -but i want to pursue MBA from a world class institute too.i feel suicidal and seek escape in these addictions.

  7. Has anyone go any advice for someone who’s PARTNER has the addiction? I love him very much but he has lost all sexual interest in me and uses porn instead. i have tried talking about it and he gets defensive and says he doesnt see a problem, and it’s a natural thing for men to do…. Any ideas? I’m not willing to just give up, but I can’t continue in a relationship like this. It makes me feel so terrible about myself.

  8. ALL PARENTS, PLEASE SEE THIS.
    (Many thanks to all those who gave the solutions .) I have been wasting a lot of my valuable time,my career,life for such bad things.DO YOU KNOW? It is not out of my own interest.One day unexpectedly i opened my net history,to see many erotic sites names.I just opened one of them,OUT OF NATURAL INTEREST a student does have(without any prior knowledge of what iam going to see).For a moment my heart sunk deep,i felt insecure in this world,tears ran down my eyes,on finding out(unexpectedly) what MY FATHER(my hero,my friend) is doing all these afternoons in the computer,with the door locked inside this blady room.I got into depression.I felt insecure to move alongside him or to think of my father(iam a girl of 19).Iam unable to decide or think,’what to do now?How could i stop this? I couldnot say all this to my mother,for,her sensitive heart may breakdown.I couldnot bear this within myself.Within a few days,i found that my father got addicted to it .He is going for these sites ragularly,he is going for adult friend finder daily.And in the course,on seeing all these (in a state of depression ),daily, while clearing the history and lateron when i got bored,i too got addicted to it.Now i lost my career ,iam unable to concentrate on anything,even on my most interesting subjects.My mind is roaming all around the world.By god’s grace,i have not fallen into any false friendships or relations(because of this depression) Tomorrow i have my internal assessment.But iam unable to keep my mind in pace.I know this is going to take away my career. ( Iam a top student till my +2, Can anyone ever believe this?) But i cant help myself out. WHAT IS MY FAULT? WHO SHOULD BECOME GUILTY FOR IT? WHY SHOULD I LOSE MY LIFE FOR IT? WHO SOWED THESE POISON SEEDS INTO MY VULNERABLE HEART ?WHO DISTURBED MY VALUABLE LIFE? YOU ,YOU SUCH PEOPLE ARE DOING THIS FOR MANY OF US.DO YOU KNOW THIS? YOU BEING PARENTS SHOULD BE ROLEMODELS FOR US,GUIDES FOR US. BUT WHAT YOU ARE DOING? WE ARE PAYING OUR LIVES FOR YOUR EMOTIONS. AND PLEASE, PLEASE TRY TO UNDERSTAND THIS (IF ANYTHING LIKE A “HEART”,” THAT OF A PARENT” ,IS STILL ALIVE IN YOU). WE ARE STILL YOUR CHILDREN ,WITH SENSITIVE HEARTS,FEELING ALONE, WAITING FOR A HELP OF TRUE LOVE.)

  9. This has really helped me a lot.

    i am 17 years old and am masturbating and watching porn since i was 15.

    it has given me a heck of a problem to me. I masturbate at least 3 times a day and felt very tiring and i felt very weak all day and night. Whenever my parents plan to go out i opt staying in the house alone so i can watch porn. After reading this i feel I have wasted my days so much and i have taken a decision and am going to fight against my addiction till i get rid of it. thanks for providing so much help and assistance. Thank you so much.

    hope to get rid of this soon.

  10. I’m 37 and I’ve been addicted to porn since I was 14 or so. It got me in trouble at home and at school. It was the cause of me losing a job. And most important, it’s aided in ruining a few relations ships, including my current one- THE most important one to me ever. She is the love of my life, my fantasy girl- has been for a very long time. I need to fix this before I lose her forever. I just don’t have the strength yet, but I’m trying. If I lose her, then I will truely be lost as well.

  11. Porn addiction can ruin your life. It is cunning and baffling. Believe me I know. I am a grateful recovering pornography addict and I lost my marriage because I was out of control. Pornography addiction is a progressive disease and it leads to other behavior that will lead to guilt and shame.

    I have created a site to help others with their struggle.

    http://lifeafterpornaddiction.com

  12. thanks a lot for this im 16 and am addicted [0-3x for 7 days a week] since 14 yrs old will try these out. always trying to resist. why these hormones?? sigh

  13. i am 15 years old and ive been adicted since i was 9. i know pretty young. im also addicted to masterbating. im am at the point were im starting to doubt my sexuality. is this normal? im so confussed and lost. im ready for change, and now i have the steps to.

  14. Hi, thank you for this site. I am a 39 year old man who has has everything anyone could want. My wife is everything in the world to me. A really inspiring and magical partner. I am not rich but live comfortably with a good job.

    I sit here now at almost 1am my time. Again I have been at my computer, looking at pornography and masturbating. At this time, I really don’t like myself. I haven’t made love to my wife in a long time. This isn’t who I want to be. She/we deserve so much better.

    I hope that in writing this I can take the first steps to curing these addictions. I’ve seen writings that state that masturbation addiction is not really scientifically acknowledged – I don’t need a qualified scientific testing – It exists, and it is stealing from my life.

    I am happy to receive any and all email in support, advice or as mutual sufferers trying to make things better.

    I will start today to do what this site suggests.

    Again my thanks to the creators of this site, there is an ugly world out there that preys upon these addictions and its good to know there are people like you around.

    Kay

    • I felt myself in your post. I have no idea how many late nights I have sat up feeling sick of myself for what I was doing. This is the most horrible feeling. I have waisted so many hours in chat rooms and on porn sites. I’ll sit down at the computer, and the next thing I know 5, 6, or even 7 hours has gone by. How much life am I missing? I despise myself when the deed is done and always swear that was the last time. But it never is. Maybe with the help of each other and this site we can really get rid of it for good!

  15. i belive this will help me there are some girls in my life that i care about too much to let them be hurt (inderecty of course i am not that addicted to u know) by my addiction

  16. and the girl i liked got pushed away by a series of unfortunate coinsides none envolving my addiction man i miss her i guess this is part of sowing and reaping pray for me as i will for u

  17. For ram: “ALL PARENTS, PLEASE SEE THIS.
    (Many thanks to all those who gave the solutions .) I have….”

    I think the problem lies with you, a habit develops from actions & thoughts. no one can teach you to be addicted to anything except yourself. Even if your father is watching porn, i dont see why u need to be affected. he could be doing it for some reasons, you need to ask him. His rolemodel impression on you might be gone, after you found out his imperfections, but youll know that ppl make mistakes.

    Really the problem lies with you, i got a similar situation like you but it never bothered me, cause i know he cares for the family and my mum alot. He might not be the dreamrolemodel, but he keeps his responsibilities( attending graduation, etc).

    The world is always imperfect, you cant do much to it, the best you can do is help yourself.. Avoid, repent and take necessary actions. May God bless u and family

  18. I recently hooked the internet up in my house. I am 24 years old and have been looking at pornography since I was about twelve. That’s half my life!

    I always knew that porno wasn’t good to look at, but always saw it as a necessary evil. Now, and you state this several times throughout your blog, it is beginning to escalate very rapidly into areas I never dreamed I would search out. I am beginning to ‘bond’ to a very perverted sphere of influence, and I feel ashamed.

    So tonight, I turned my moderate safe search with google on. I

    Thank you for your support.

  19. Porn is as we all very well know is a spirit of lust that we allow to take control of our bodies. The only thing that can set a person free is Jesus we have got to come to understand what Gods word says about submission…This sounds simple and I know its very hard I am a ex porn addict. These steps are very good but I only advise you to seek God and fast for deliverance. Get your mind made up who you are gonna serve. You and the devil or God. Key scriptures ,,always fight the devil with the word just like Jesus did in the wilderness of temptation. Quote the word! LIVE IT!!! Key scriptures KJV ONLY James 4:7 Phill 4:13 Romans 12:1,2 PLease email me for any more advice I am a licensed evangelist. God help us all is my prayer. EMAIL ANYTIME

  20. To the owner of this site, thanks for having the courage and care to provide help to others…may God bless you richly.

    I have been addicted for about 15 years now, and I am on the way to recovery. I was happy to find this site and the steps, which work very well. I have been utilizing steps similar to these that I came up with, and all glory be to God for helping me through.

    For those who feel hopeless, rejoice and be glad! For the mere fact that you are researching the problem shows there is a desire to quit and that is half the battle. It takes a while, but it is achievable. Measure your success in days or even hours if you have to and push for better from there.

    To overcome this addiction, you have to embrace it. Accept it as part of who you are. I too used to masturbate about 3 times a day when I was in my late teens. Then when the desire to stop came, I started by reducing the masturbation to no more than once a day. It was strange at first, scheduling masturbation into my daily routine. This gave ME the control…soon I controlled it rather than it controlling me!

    Cut the porn, but not cold turkey. Seek less graphic material to resensitize your body to the graphic stuff; then stay away from it! When you feel the overwhelming pressure to look, look at soft core instead of the hard stuff. If like myself you look at porn at night mostly, then find a way to knock yourself out…I used to drink a full glass of wine and by the time the pressure to look came, I was too tired or already asleep.

    Burn your energy before it turns into the burning desire to look and masturbate. Engage in a sporting or physically demanding activity that requires you to participate…for example, a coach or a team is counting on you. Give it ALL you’ve got, so that by the end of the day you are too tired to masturbate.

    Find a replacement for porn that is healthy. Find something else that interests you…it doesn’t matter what it is as long as it is healthy. It is OK to be addicted to stuff (for exmple living green)…just not stuff that is unhealthy. Whatever it is should involve others. Doing anything alone is very dangerous for a porn addict.

    Know yourself, and hold yourself accountable. Give yourself slef-assesments, and take a hard look at what happened whenever you ‘fall’, then guard against it. For me, being alone meant I was going to find a way to self gratify thru porn; so I started avoiding being alone until it no longer was an issue.

    Watch what you eat! There is a link between HIGH FRUCTOSE CORN SYRUP (sweetner used in sodas, candies, and pretty much EVERYTHING) and masturbating. Same for high quantities fo sugar. I am not a scientist, but when I cut the high fructose corn syrup, the urge to masturbate drastically reduced.

    Eat healthy and light. For me, a full stomach meant I had the energy to go ‘rub one off’, especially if I just consumed vast quantities of sweet foods or fast food. If I inadvertently ate too much, then I went for a walk. It burned the food and it tired me out.

    Actively block out the images that are already in your head. Focusing on those images will guarantee self defeat. Stop fantasizing about sex…ignore the opposite sex if necessary. Fantasize about other things like if you won the lottery or something.

    Porn is tricky, but you can control the addiction. Lee (above) said AVOID, REPENT and TAKE NECESSARY ACTIONS…that is very good advice.

    GOD help us all :)

  21. I curse myself every day because I have been unable to form a good relationship since my teen years, adolences years and now in my adult life.

    I am now 31 and wish I could have all these years back or start all over again but alas! life goes on!!
    I will not blame porn or masturbation but I solely blame myself for getting into it and allowing it rack my life. It is only I who can correct it and hopefully live life to fullest in my remaining days, months, years on earth!!

    Tonight is my starting point by God’s grace!! Please pray for me or email me if you have some advice or message! God bless!

  22. I am 30 years old and have been watching porn since I was 19. For most of that time, (probably up until 3 years ago), I was convinced it was normal. Or either I convinced myself of that. TV, friends, music. It all made it seem ok. But my heart and concious finally cought up to me. PORN IS DISCUSTING AND THERE IS NOTHING HEALTHY OR PRODUCTIVE ABOUT IT!!! I still struggle with it but I have really improved in this last year. I feel that porn is the reason for so many of my insecurities and failed relationships and I pray daily to totally get past it. There will always be a scar because of how long I let it go on, but I pray and I ask you to pray for me to allow that scar to close up and begin to heal. Jesus and myself will not have a complete and healthy relationship until I descipline myself through Christ to make the right decision every time I feel the urge.
    Making love with the woman you love is a beautiful thing and it should not be tarnished by hours and hours of viewed explicit material. I’ve fallen in love with a wonderful woman and she has two kids from a previous marriage. One of the kids is a two year old daughter. It sickens me that (hypothetically she and I end things) if I don’t get over my problem now, what if one day 16 years down the road I was watching that little girl, then a young woman, on video?
    I feel so ashamed of my recent past, but I also realize that through Christ, all things are possible. It takes time. It will not normally happen overnight but it is happening. Thank you Lord for sending your Son and for forgiving me of my many sins. Your love and grace are amazing to me. I will never be worthy of You, yet You love me still. I’m so sorry for my consistent weakness but I thank You for having me on the right road to recovery.
    I will pray for each and every one of you above. As I’m sure each of you above experienced, it’s tough to get on here and write about such a weakness but I have respect for each and every one of you. I pray that you are all at a better place with this than you were when you left your comment. Keep your head up and your sights on the target.

  23. i am writing because i have been addicted to porn and masturbation since i was 12 (i am currently 28). i never thought that watching porn and masturbating would be too big of a deal. since about a year ago i have been loosing my libido and sex drive and couldn’t even finish having intercourse with my girlfriend. i feel frustrated. i have been doubting my manhood and i am not happy with myself right now. i was even thinking about taking medication such as viagra to help me keep an erection when having sexual intercouse, but i am a young person and i dont want to rely on medication. i will try to see a doctor about this problem because it is very serious. i posting this blog because i don’t know who to vent my problems to. thank you for listening to my sad story.

  24. Hi there , I’ve been stuggling with a porn addiction for years. I’m now 34 years old and still single. Porn has ruined my perceptions about life in general. I was and still am a very shy person , and porn has become a cheap and easy substitute for a real relationship with a woman. I’m just now learning how dangerous this addiction can be. I’ve spent countless hours surfing the internet for hardcore pornography , time that was completely wasted , and for what? It’s taken a long time for me to realize that those who produce and sell porn are taking advantage of us financially and spirtually. Thank God for this site and ones like it , for I feel like i’m finally on the road to recovery.

  25. I have been accicted to porn and masterbating for nearly 20 years and it is time to stop. God has been so good to me. He has been so patient and kind. I want to stop and can usually stop for a long time, but the desires always come back. I guess we always have to be on the guard. I think the single most important goal for me is to recognize the places and the times when I am most likely to be alone, that way I can set goals for myself to avoid those situations. God Bless to all who are endeavoring to stop. It is valiant of you to do so. Jesus does indeed love us and in fact he even likes us. He likes us so much that he was willing to die a brutal death just so he could spend time with us. I am so grateful for his love for as the Bible says it is truely His loving kindness that leads us to repentance. The Bible also tells us to confess our sins to eachother so that we may be healed of the sin that is entangling us. Find someone who has the same goals and drive as you do and commit to pursuing a porn and masturbation free life.

  26. Looking @ pornography is I feel the most horrible sin to commit, yet i have been doing it since the 6th grade… I keep hearing that “It’s normal” but it isn’t, the only thing that is a result is the biggest guilt that you can have. I am a Pastor’s son who is 16 years old, who is the drummer of a church, has a wonderful family, and a wonderful girlfriend that anyone could want. For a long time i have been praying to God to help me over come this addiction, sure everybody has their own addiction but pornography is the same as every other drug or addiction. Reading all of these comments makes me realize that I am not alone, and that there are many people (including Christians, etc) that are fighting this addiction. The only reason why I looked at porno recently is that i fell into the temptation (through censored commercials, etc) which made me horny. I lost my Girlfriend before because of Pornography but we got back together a year later because God is helping me fight this addiction. At the moment, I’m feeling horrible while writing this comment but at the same time happy because again there are many people facing the same problem as I am. I will continue to fight my addiction against pornography and I’ll be sure to have God by my side and I pray that he can give me the wisdom to flee from whatever temptation comes to me because in the bible it says only Jesus was able to resist temptation and not fall into it.

    I thank whoever made this site and I thank everyone who wrote these comments and for reminding me that I am not alone.

    If you want to join me in this battle and so that we can beat this addiction together, contact me in my email:
    It is good to do this because the more soldiers that fight against the same enemy, the higher chance there is to defeat it.

    God bless you all!

  27. Dear All,

    Thank you all for being stong enogh to post, there are many that dont take the second step after reading the post which is to leave one for the next person and a reminded for your own commitment. Firstly, I fell through the cracks after being sober for several year. I was in school and enjoying my education and as a result didnt get much time. Then i started to work which use to keep the mind away from this shamful crime. I Decided i wanted to go back to school and get more education and some how i got caught in a room with high speed internet and no one to look over my sholder (try NOT to stay alone NEVER). It is better to think about a love one and plan what you would like to do with them i.e. go out and have a good time. So now i am falling behind in studies and thinking it will just take a few min and then i can get back to work BUT NOO! it is evil and does not let you realize that you are spending several hours and not min. Well so here I am mid 20s and having to slap myself on the wrist for such a mistake. I have moved to a place where there are more people that i can talk and keep my mind active and productive. Just try to think what you could do to help all the poor people in third world nations by doing small project in the field that you studied in or will study, and if your younger come one you can get a copy of software and make some flyer or poster. Sorry going off on to a tangent. What i am tryin to say is like many said before me and proved that you need to keep youself buzzzay stick to a hobby and play sports and lots of it so that you are able to dream. People dream when they are tired and you want to dream that nice Red sports car with the top down wind in you face as you drive down the hills watching the horses race along in the rich green grass. This was an other way to help youself to start writing discriptive happy stories that you imagin or has happen to you with some addition to make it fun. You can always read them and remember the happy times.

    Wow this is getting long. I am happy that this site is here to save us all from the door of hell. May God keep us all on the path of the pure faith and Enter us to Heaven. Amen!

    I wish i could keep going till i fall asleep but then i would get an error and this would not be shared with you all.

    O Parents please do us all a favour and be cheap and get slow internet and Net Nanny if its still there a software that monitors the porn.

  28. I am 40 yr old male married with beautiful wife and a baby girl, I have been addicted to porn and masturbation for almost 10 yrs now. I do it atlest once or twice every week. Everytime I do, I feel terrible and guilty. On the otherside, I am a very religious and god fearing person.

    I watch porn and masturbate only during my office hours ( I am on my own business).

    I need a desparate help to overcome this.

    Please help

  29. I am addicted to porn – magazines, internet, videos, whatever is available. It has become a daily struggle and I am drowning. I find myself seeking ways to avoid family interaction; stay up late; stay home when others are going out so that I can escape to the computer. It dominates my thoughts at nearly all times. When I walk into a store, bar, restaurant even a church, the first thing I do is look for the hottest woman in the place and find myself looking back at her over and over again. I am disgusted with myself and don’t understand why I cannot stop. I have read so many of the posts herein and realize that so many have similar tales. Can this insidious disease really be beaten???…

  30. Yeah pornography will destroy your life. Any addiction will destroy your life. You lose the people you love, the job you strove to obtain, the education you desire…

    I know, like all the rest I have had some kind of addiction to porn or lust since 6th grade. I can remember the first time, my father left something on the computer and I was just simply curious. I had no idea that my life could have changed in one moment…forever. Since then it’s always on my mind.

    For a time it seemed to get better, but then after going to college where there’s wireless internet everywhere it was so hard not to glance and then stare. The worst part is that I can’t tell her about it. By her I mean my girlfriend. She’s the most amazing girl I’ve ever met. She helped me deal with my past before, and then I fell again.

    I just can’t bear to see her face if I told her. There are so many reasons why I don’t want to do this. For her, for my health, my Savior, my family, my joy. There’s nothing that is good about this disgusting addiction. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it.

    I need to make this commitment here and now for anyone to see…
    From now on, I’m a different person. I will no longer look at those images which cause me to lust. I will make the hardest effort to control my thoughts better than I ever have. I wont hurt her again.

    Thank you for having this place where people can do this. God bless you.

  31. People do not realize that as children grow up in this busy, media driven world that they are freely given access to dangerous ideas and images. I was not monitored growing up I could watch whatever I wanted because I had a television in my room, before the whole digital stuff. I would watch movies that had some very explicit sexual content without thinking there was anything wrong. Than I became a christian and realized that what I was doing was sinful and destructive. I didn’t date a lot in high school but had lots of friends so I was busy. While when I was seventeen my sisters had all moved out and it was just me and my mom and she was gone a lot. I spent so much time home alone that a couple of times I stumbled into sites that were really bad but I was curious and so I became addicted.

    I don’t think people realize this but I am girl and it is something that girls deal with. I used it as a way to soothe my loneliness and distract from real issues. It is wrong so very bad it has turned me into a deceiver and makes me feel shameful and dirty and that just feeds back into the emotional cycle so I desire to break the chain of such an ugly sin and finally feel free to live as a true christian unencumbered by these sinful thoughts.

  32. Thankyou for writing this article.

    I want today to be a new chapter in my life. I am sick and tired of this porn and mastrubation addiciton. I started looking at porn when i was 13, i said to myself dont worry ill just take a peek…its not like im going to get addicted or anything.

    However things turned out bad. I totally stumbled and now i am approaching 15 and i really am hooked on to it. But today i hope that thorugh this article and through god that i will be able to overcome the evil addiction. I am happy that this is the begining to the rest of my life and no more am i going to let this evil thing control me. I want my life back and i want to learn from the mistakes that i have made.

    I pray for each and everyone who has posted and is going to post, who sincerely want to overcome this addiction. I pray that everyone will overcome and get their life back on track once again. Lets fight this addiction!

    I hope to post sometime in the future and tell about my progress! Im doing this one to get my life back and for Jesus!

  33. Thank you for posting this entry.

    Probably, I used masturbation as an escape to problems. I have been doing it since I was 14(out of curiosity). Ever since, then I can’t stop the activity which led to addiction. Every time I felt like doing it, I feel guilty. This probably is one reason why I feel this lack the lack of self-confidence. This also leads me to have baseless reasoning and paranoia For all those people out there who’s sharing the same feeling as I have, do not fret God is here.

    Let us simply pray for each other. We can do this!

  34. Thank you for posting this entry.

    Probably, I used masturbation as an escape to problems. I have been doing it since I was 14(out of curiosity). Ever since, then I can’t stop the activity which led to addiction. Every time I felt like doing it, I feel guilty. This probably is one reason why I feel this lack the lack of self-confidence. This also leads me to have baseless reasoning and paranoia For all those people out there who’s sharing the same feeling as I have, do not fret God is here.

    Let us simply pray for each other. We can do this!

  35. I am almost 15 years old and i hav been watching porn since 6th grade. I read this and i raely want to change. But the problem is i keep getting these temptations and i don’t know how to resist. I know i should not fall but i do. But i know that Jesus has turned a new page in my life. He has woken me up. My mom just today got her visa denied. that means my family has 30 days to live in America or to send in another appeal. Please pray for me as i continue on this journey. Pray especially for my mom’s visa please and also for my being able to resist temptaion and these bad thoughts i have. God Bless You ALL.

  36. I am 24 years old, I have been addicted since I was 12. I failed to believe that it was ever out of my control. The void of never having a true relationship and lack of a public life started from the beggining and has only made things worse. I feel suicidal at times but never know why, other than the fact that I feel worthless or useless. In the back of my mind porn as an addiction has always been present but I was dismissive when it came to stopping. Porn addiction has come and gone recently and every time it is worse. Today will be a new day, to see myself in a new light live a new life achieve the ultimate success. Thank you to the person who started this website.

  37. I have left my personal testimony on how to overcome masterbation on this site, but feel a few words are also needed regarding internet porn.

    Having originally been only pay sites, there are now sites where access is free for full length films and this has been my personal next step in my downfall and why I must now stop. To be able to see what I want when I want has made it all to easy and is impacting my relationship with my wife as she cannot live up to the variety available on the sites. I feel awful everytime I do this but never thing about that prior to looking at the sites only after.

    So I have vowed to to change to all of you, God, my wife and myself. Writing these testimonies is my start.

    In bookmrking this site I am intending to use it as an alternative to looking at porn. There are many people with the same problem we all need to encouarge each other to stop.

    Best of luck and God’s blessing to you all in this challenge.

    Fred

  38. i am a porn addict, i have been for four years now, i now believe in God but i want to make it true to the lord by proving i can change, i believe in over coming porn addiction i can find God and following jesus our saviour ways. My journey starts today, i know i will change, i am 17 turning 18 i feel so ashamed of my life, and im going to do whatever it takes to overcome the temptation of the devil, whatever happens..let us never give up, thanks for listening

  39. Thanks to everyone who writes something down here. I read it once a week. and it helps me over come my addiction. Great job to everyone.

  40. Thanx for this blog. I am 21 and i’ve been addicted to pornography and masturbation since i was about 17. I realy want to stop. It’s realy corrupted my mind to the point i feel that im better off dead, and it makes me feel dirty. So far it’s ruined my previous relationship,and i dnt want it to ruin my current one. I realy appreciate what you’ve done with this blog,im inspired to stop,il make sure il keep visiting.and i truly blieve that we can do this together. God bless

  41. Im 26 i have lost the love of my life from my addiction to porn. i started watching porn when i was about 15 when we got our first pc at home and taught nothing of it. i didnt realise how bad things were till it was too late. i have been with my exgirlfriend for the last 2 years and i have watched porn almost every night in secret. my girlfriend tried to help me by scratching some of my dvd’s and she even got me an artical about porn addiction but i just got angry and wouldnt believe i had a problem. i lost my lobedu and made my girlfriend feel she was unattractive and like i didn’t want her, she starved herself to try look more attractive for me, i feel sick when i think how bad i let things get. she eventually broke up with me and now hates me, i am left depressed and suicidal. im filled with regret and shame. i have destroyed my porn collection and will never watch it again. i hope reading my story will stop someone messing up their life as much as i have. ill pray for everyone to beat their addiction.

  42. Hey everybody. I’ve got a pretty similar story to the ones I’ve read so far. In my pre-teen years I was exposed to pornography and have struggled with it ever since (26 now). I can go a while without actually viewing the material, but even during those times I find myself struggling with thoughts that are completely impure and atrocious. I’m happily married, and I’ve been open and honest with my wife (without being too graphic) about my problem and she’s been patient and loving towards me. The problem still remains though, and I want to be rid of it – not just the material, but the desire to view it or act it out with my wife – once and for all. I know that I can overcome this with the help of Christ, as some have acknowledged. Also, when I do struggle and fall into temptation, it’s really important that I remember that I’m not worthless, and that Christ has paid for each and every sin I have ever committed, and ever will. I’m hoping that sharing this information publically will help to strengthen my desire to do what is right in God’s eyes, rather than succumb to the terrible desires of my flesh. I will pray for all of you, and thank you for your prayers. Try reading Psalm 51 if you are feeling depression sink in after failing again. God bless you all, and never give up! Remember that one day, no matter how much we struggle in this life, all our pain and suffering will come to an end. Focus on the blessings in your life, and pray for strength to not just overcome addiction, but the deeply rooted desire to view this foul debauchery that plagues this world.

    Love in Christ,
    Nate

  43. I am 40 father of 5 kids. I have had an on and off struggle overcoming this addiction since I was 6. I have been attending a 12 steps program for the last 6 months and have been doing much better. I still struggle. Today it has made me mad that I do it makes me mad that it is wrong and no good comes from it. I would like to have sex with many women for hours a day I know that would be bad but I still want it and my wife suffers because I have been unfaithful. I have never had sex with another woman since we have been married 16 years but I have been to many strip clubs and looked online at many women. It is very comforting. I am frustrated that I still want to act out. I have been very successful in not acting out but God I want to and it pisses me off that I can’t without destroying my life. I feel for you all. Especially the girl who found her Dads stuff. God I want to be a good father I love my kids so much I would give my life for them I will keep fighting the fight but I wish I could give up, I know I can not.

  44. Yes I am addicted to porn and I see it as a end result of somthing thats wrong inside of me ( an acting out ) just like an alcaholic or any other addiction.If I am trying to hide these painfull feelings about myself or some rejection that happened to me in the past I will use porn to hide or deal with the pain I am trying to avoid.However If I listen to the thoughts That are so painfull and deal with the negative messages that are coming to my brain I should be able to reduce the urge to want to use porn to get away from the pain.One example is to use Gods word and what he says about me and not what the world or signifigant others say about me or my own negitive thoughts about myself.Depresion then must be the real reason why we have addiction problems,not?

  45. I am 17 and as far as i could remeber porn and masturbation have been stuck on my mind since age 12. the urges really get strong in the summer when my parents work and the computer is all mine. i usually masturbate arond 7 to 10 times a week and i keep telling the lord i would stop. after finding this site it has helped me and hopefully it helps get rid of my addictions to both pornography and masturbatin. after reading everyone elses comments it made me want to express my feelings and i belive that i am taking a big step to stopping my addiction. please pray for me as i will be praying for anyone else with these addictions. thank you.

  46. I am 26 years old and have had an addiction to porn since a very young age. I don’t know why I keep looking at it. I have a wonderful wife and job. I don’t know what makes me so selfish when it comes to this habit. God help me and all of you. Life is too short and too precious to be wasted like this.

  47. hi. i am so pleased to read from so many people all over the world – ready to overcome this evil of pornography. it goes to say that the problem might be universal afterall, but not invincible. i am 28 years of age. going down the memory lane, i began watching porn at the age of 17. then, it was a peep and nothing more. I always felt disdain for the pictures, pity for the actors… but a certain curiosity kept me going back to it. i must confess that i began seriously watching porn, graduating fast to hardcore around 3 years ago…. In my recent past, i have devoted hours upon hours to watching various forms of pornography. It is disgraceful. I even missed school one day, because i was engrossed in the porn i was watching online. It has led me into masturbating…a habit that leaves me wasted and tired. It robs me physically, emotionally and spiritually. I’ve learnt through my experience that Pornography is a passion that drives man to a bottomless pit. the passion can never be satisfied. it craves for more and more adventure. Lurid Sites that pissed me off before soon became my favourite, and no later, became insufficient to satisfy my licentious desires. Pornography is evil. it ensnares its merchants, buyers and the sold. it separates one from Deity and Duty. it has affected almost all my relationships…family, friends and colleagues, coz i hardly have time for them now. Pornography has stolen my life and time. but i know that i will get them all back, because God is always faithful. He will heal and bring us back, when we go back to him. for all who are in this struggle, i dare say: DON’T GIVE UP. We might have fallen, but we are not on the ground. the harder the struggle, the sweeter the reward. If the prize is not priceless, then, the evil of pornography would not be so grasping. Keep up the struggle!

  48. I’ve learnt through my experience that Pornography is a passion that drives man to a bottomless pit. the passion can never be satisfied. it craves for more and more adventure. Lurid Sites that pissed me off before soon became my favourite, and no later, became insufficient to satisfy my licentious desires. Pornography is evil. it ensnares its merchants, buyers and the sold. it separates one from Deity and Duty. it has affected almost all my relationships…family, friends and colleagues, coz i hardly have time for them now. Pornography has stolen my life and time. but i know that i will get them all back, because God is always faithful. He will heal and bring us back, when we go back to him. for all who are in this struggle, i dare say: DON’T GIVE UP. We might have fallen, but we are not on the ground. the harder the struggle, the sweeter the reward. If the prize is not priceless, then, the evil of pornography would not be so grasping. Keep up the struggle

  49. guys, the problem is not porn addiction – that is only the symptom. The problem has to be emotional. The question is why we have an urge to look at porn while someone who is not addicted doesn’t have that urge. The urge has it’s roots in emotions. Are we trying to escape hurtful emotions? I have noticed I feel a strong urge to look at porn when I’m feeling weak inside. To escape this pain I indulge in this activity so that I feel pleasure not pain. I have a dependancy on this addiction in trying to deal (more like escape) the real problems. Everytime after watching/mastrubating I feel my mind going numb and feel peaceful again. Isn’t this something a junkie feels after taking a hit?! There are chemicals being released in the brain that are covering up the hurt/pain we are trying to run away from. This is why we feel good – cos the pain has been numbed again!

    We can only overcome this by facing and taking steps to sort out whatever is bothering us. If you have been bullied as a child and that’s what’s driving you to porn, then face those memories. Cry your heart out. If you feel weak, take some martial arts classes and build your confidence. I bet all this will take time but this is the only way to permanently get over this addiction.
    For this reason, we should not look at recovery success by measuring it in number of days we have controlled it. That’s just trying to control the symptom. As long as the root causes are still there, the urge will remain as strong as ever. I think you should look at how the urge reduces over the recovery period. In the end you should not have a need to ‘control’ yourself from watching porn. You just won’t feel the need to watch it. Wouldn’t that be great! :-) Good luck to everyone and keep trying – cos as long as you keep trying you don’t lose.

  50. I am glad that this site was created and that we, for some reason, sought it out. I am in my 20s and I have been addicted to porn and masterbation for about 8 years. The best I have ever done at quitting is making it 11 months. I did that by constantly being around somebody who had higher moral standards than me and would refuse to see such filth. I thought I had overcome it but then it got bad again. I’m committed once again to quit, but this time for good. I have a girlfriend that I love and want to marry and I dont want this to ruin anything for me. I am also religious and that has a big role in my life. Such things are a filth that dirties our souls, but does not stain them. The filth can be removed and I know that myself, and everyone addicted, is a better individual than the shallow fool who seeks out degrading daughters of God. I have started a process motivated by myself, and influenced by this site and the testimonies on here. We are all taking a step in the right direction and I will be back on this site to leave a comment of how I have been successful in changing who I have been acting like to who I really am, free of pornography and comfortable in my own skin.

  51. I am approaching my late teen years and am struggling to break the hold of porn addiction. I don’t feel like I have a very strong addiction as it is not exceptionally frequent (3-5 times a week) but I still feel that it is damaging me emotionally. I am finding it harder and harder to build relationships with females, despite being a friendly and easy going person. It is not just romantic relationships with women but forming friendships, it just doesnt seem to happen. I always feel as if they are judging me and I think that pornography addiciton is responsible

  52. I have been encouraged by these comments. Iam a 40 year old married guy with a wonderful wife and 4 kids. Iam also a religious person but this addiction is tearing me apart from inside. It started when a colleague mentioned a website that was erotic. That was the start of the slippery road to the abyss. Iam a believer in God’s power and help and really fought the urge and managed to abstain by promising myself not to repeat the habit and setting a heavy financial penalty as well as some fasting. This seemed to work wonders and after paying the penalty once i managed to stay off the addiction for almost a couple of years. Then satan found a way to break me again. I suffered from low libido and while reading an article on the net about overcoming it, it mentioned that some men improved their libido’s by watching filthy stuff. This was the trigger which once again led me back into the habit. This is how satan works (i’m not passing the buck but that is how most of us are misled). I know that it is wrong and that how will i face my creator when i meet him, but the urge ovecomes me. I pray to Him to help me overcome this. By the way i found very useful advice esp. about sports and exercise and cutting the source of the evil and the comment from the daughter to parents was really moving. My advice (although i still haven’t won the fight myself) is 1. Always be hopeful that you will not give in. See it as a fight or a challenge. 2. Write down your feelings or resolutions about it (i.e to stop). 3. Never lose faith in God, ask Him to help you out.

  53. hi its good to know that am not the only one suffering with this porn addiction it has taken so much of my self esteem and confidence and every time am about to achieve a goal a slip and feel so ashamed afterwards i just pray to God that he wiil help me overcome this addiction so i could look at the girl i love with the respect her beauty deserves recovering addicts take refuge in 1 corinthians where it says that God will always offer a way out of temptation we just have to look for it and he will never allow us to be tempted by sumtin we cannot overcome

  54. hi am so encouraged by your many posts this addiction has rily taken a toll on my self esteem nd confidence i feel so ashamed bout it i just pray that God will help me overcome this addiction so that i can look at the girl that i love with the respect her beauty deserves but all is not lost let us take refuge in 1 corinthians which says that God will always offer a way out of temptation we just have to look for it and He will never allow sumtin that we cannot overcome to tempt us

  55. I am now 28 and have been looking at porn since the age of 12. At it’s worst I was looking at porn every day for several hours and I felt terrible. More recently I have reduced my pornography use, and only look at it once every two months or so for a couple of hours. I feel that looking at my emotions, self hatred anger and past traumas has helped me achieve this, however I am still not 100% free and when the craving arises it is NEARLY impossible to resist. But every time you do resist you become stronger and the habit becomes weaker. When I lapse (like today) I find it hard and I really beat myself up about it as well as feeling massively guilty. But most men don’t even see porn as a problem, so pretty much everyone who is reading this is at least one step ahead. I think porn has to be one of the hardest addictions to quit with the internet the way it is. You don’t even have to go to the shop or the drug dealer, it’s streamed into house in unlimited supply and you don’t even have to pay for it. How many crack or herion addicts would succeed in quiting in those kind of circumstances? I think to succeed in quiting you need to tackle the issue from all angles, try and increase your will power by waiting for the urge to pass. When craving arises just tell yourself, I’ll wait an hour, or two hours and gradually increase this until you can wait for days weeks months, maybe even years. But it is true that you need to explore the emptiness and voidness that you are filling with porn if you really want to succeed. I dream of a day when I no longer crave porn but until then I set my sights at this target and try to keep moving in the right direction.

  56. Let us fight this addiction, persevere, emerge victorious

    champions, and live the remainder of our lives knowing that

    we have overcome the greatest test/challenge/temptation

    of the 21st century. Thanks for all the testimonials, I will pray

    for everyone to be set free from this malignant cyst

  57. Upon dicovering my husband of 17 years addiction to porn, I have suffered great emotional distress and upheavel as well as feelings of hatred toward him. I simply do not understand how a man can pass up all that makes sense in his life, simply to oogle over some degrading images. It has affected our sex life and I am beginning to wonder what it would feel like to have a man “make love” to me. Will probably send me to the arms of another. I am already begiining to fantasize about other men.

  58. I am finding that my addiction to porn is gradually spiraling out of control. I can spend literally hours looking through the crap without masturbation. Very little of it arouses me and some disgusts me. I find that there are only certain clips that I like, often because I find the models within them attractive. It’s little more than a substitute for the real affection I want to show and the real pleasure I would like to give in a proper full, in my case heterosexual relationship. I also have deep feelings of failure and inadequacy. I have no job and have suffered from OCD for years. I also feel that I am too old to start thinking about relationships, something which in view of my poor mental health might not be a good idea to begin with. I am not a great looking guy, something which I am constantly reminded of when I go out even by total strangers who comment on how morphologicaly challenged I am. The distaste and animosity I attract I wouldn’t wish on some of our worst criminals. My appearance has led to outright rejection by peer groups over the years and even criticism from my own family. I use porn as a means of accessing something I can never have, when viewing the porn, I often imagine myself in the place of the participants as either male or female. My past sexual experiences have been almost exclusively homosexual, but I find that as I am getting older my interests are becoming increasingly heterosexual, very strongly so. When I seek help, all I get is the usual rubbish about denial of my gayness rather than accepting that I no longer have the homosexual preferences that I expressed in the past. I find the ideas of rape and incest totaly disgusting and have never sought to download images of this nature, even if they are mostly simulated. Sometimes porn represents things I certainly wouldn’t want and have no desire to download. I’m pretty disgusting anyway and would like to change, but the last thing I need is religion. I am having considerable difficulty marrying my life experience with a warm and compasionate personal god. I am looking for a scientific and materialistic approach to my problem. I appreciate now that I am far from unique as far as this problem is concerned.

    • Your story lays heavy on my heart and has brought me to tears. I know you don’t want to hear anything about religion but you obviously posted looking for help and from my experience spiritual awakening through god is the only way to receive the help that we all so desperately need. I hope you’ll open up your heart and mind to see that god loves you and there are people out there that will accept and love you as well. Only god’s grace is sufficient. I will pray for you.

  59. I first got exposed to porn because of my father. I was about 10 years old when I first found out a stack of dirty magazines hidden among some of the old books, those obviously belonged to my father. (Because later I saw he was turning the house upside down to find those.) My mother had been passed away by that time and may be because of the loneliness of separation from his wife, my father might had addicted to those xxx magazines. However, its not an excuse when he kept them in a close reach of 10 year old kid. I have not even known what sex is then. I was a very good student and always the first in my class. Teachers just adored me because I was very good at studies as well as extra curricular activities. I used to read a lot (good literature) So, when I found those xxx magazines, I read them all. I understood some of them and because of some reason that I can’t remember now (now I’m 30), wanted to read them again and again. After about two years of discovering xxx magazines, my father also passed away. So, I was a child without parents. Then, I started thinking about those magazines I found sometimes back. I could recall most of the stories (may be I had a good memory since I was very good at studies) I started thinking about them like fantasy. I was a teenage then, and when I was thinking about them, I felt that my body became sexually high. So, without even knowing the meaning of masturbation, I started touching my private parts and eventually came to my first orgasm. That feeling was wonderful at the beginning. So I started doing it again and again. During my teens, I used to masturbate almost every night and sometimes even during day times when I’m at home, at school in the bathroom, in empty extra curricular classrooms, every night before sleep, etc. It helped me to fall into sleep easily. (As I thought those days.) Since I was a student and porn was not available, didn’t have internet and computer, and didn’t have money or guts to buy magazines, I really addicted to sex fantasies. I started with thinking about the stories I first read in magazines and then started creating my own fantasies as a foreplay before masturbation. So, most of my creative energies and power of imagination was wasted on unhealthy sex fantasies. As a student, this really affect my studies, Because my mind’s ability to focus on studies, imagine educational success and be creative in education was destroyed by continuous focus and practice of sexual imaginations. Things became worst when I met my first boyfriend, who was a sex addict. He forcefully raped me. I loved him so didn’t give up on him. After that he wanted me to have sex with him, like everyday. I was going to school and having sex and doing all the things he wanted me to do. He was an abusive man who actually hit me every time even I speak to one of my friend’s dads. I had that affair with him for two years. He didn’t want to sexually satisfy me. So, I got more and more addicted to masturbation. During the day, I just satisfied his sexual needs and before sleep, I masturbated. So that way I became a really bad teen without anyone to guide me. I actually became bad at my studies too. Somehow, luckily I was able to get away from that abusive relationship after 2 years thanks to my uncles who were totally against the relationship.

    However, I failed to get away from masturbation. By this time, I’ve developed a strong practice of sexual fantasies, sometimes I couldn’t think of anything else. I knew that it was so disturbing but wasn’t able to stop it. Because of that bad habit, I didn’t perform well in my education the way everyone expected. (It was a huge disappointment for me.) Somehow I managed to enter the University. (Not to the degree I wanted to do but to a lower one, as the degree I wanted needed better performance at college.) During this time, I found my second boyfriend. He was a nice man, but very much addicted to porn videos. Again I found he’d hidden the videos in our closet and I started seeing them when he was not home. That was like a masturbation booster. Sometimes I saw bad videos for the whole day when he’s not home. and masturbated several times a day. That ruined my day and at the end of my day, I’m physically and emotionally drained. (Sometimes I didn’t drink water for the whole day, just ate something while sitting in front of the TV) My boyfriend was not strong in sex. He got premature ejaculation and couldn’t last for at least a minute. So I became so much addicted to masturbation. Even when he’s sleeping in the bed, I used to imagine a sexy story and masturbate quietly. So that way, all my good power of imagination was taken over by a really bad habit. I was losing so much of time, mental energy, physical energy. I didn’t even want to meet my friends, exercise or do anything healthy. So, porn and masturbation controlled my whole being and I felt really terrible.
    I wanted to break that bad habit somehow before it ruins me entirely. (I realized that my whole being was took over by imagining sex all the time/wired sex it was) and all the event that seemed to occur was also stimulating and making it a recursive cycle. (Thoughts become things – I got raped once again by another man while been still attached to my boyfriend, so many guys approached and proposed me to have relationships etc.) Finally I realized that from the very good, innocent, intelligent student, I had become a sex maniac.

    Probably God decided to give me a chance when I met this other nice guy. soon I found that he is full of character, determination and willpower. (not good for a bad woman like me.) However, apart from my sex addiction, I was still a helpful, sensitive, hard working woman. So I broke up with the porn addict boyfriend and then got married to the nice guy. He was really nice but I couldn’t tell him my addiction to masturbation. I think for the first time in my life, I had sex with love and that was with my husband. But every time I found it was difficult to prepare my body for him because of my mind was totally taken over by masturbation. I could prepare for sex only by imagining fantasies or seeing bad movies, but not by the foreplay. To come over the bad feelings, again I got addicted to porn, but this time on the internet. Sometimes, I got leave from work and just saw porn on the computer all day long, and felt terrible at the end of each and every time I did it.

    This was just too much. I was sure by this time that I’m too much addicted to masturbation and porn both. It was a recursive cycle. But non of my family and friend knew this. Apart from difficulty to initiate sex with my husband, I was a very good, committed wife and a good friend. Time to time, I remembered all my friends who were not so smart at school but got better degrees than me and got married earlier than me and got better jobs too because of better utilization of their time in childhood and teens. So, I started thinking about everything I lost because of this bad habit. I wanted to change, but it was so difficult. For the last 3 years since I was married, I am trying very hard to come over this bad habit. Sometimes, I go without porn or masturbation for about a month and then it again takes over my mind.

    Today, honestly after about 4 hours seeing porn online, I felt terrible again and started looking at how to avoid this problem for the first time. So I found this website and some articles that are very useful.

    I’m a new person from today, from this very moment. I’m trying to be honest to my career, studies, family, body and health by overcoming this terrible thing that has wrapped me for a long time like 20 years. Its like a serpent who wraps your whole being and sucks your life. I’m going to kill the beast and to win for the sake of my dear husband and for the sake of our future.

    My messages to everyone who is looking at this site are:
    (1) If you are a parent, never ever expose your child to porn, x-rated magazines, dirty books, or even you having sex with your spouse. Young children’s minds are so pure and absorbs everything so easily and they want to try out everything. I can still recall even the dialogues I found in my dad’s xxx magazines. They get recorded in young minds forever, so later whenever they get a chance to find out more of those and experiments, they do it and then get addicted to feeling. The rest of the story is ruining of education, health etc. Even they achieve some status in life (like I did) they would never achieve their fullest potential. So, even without knowing, my dad did that harm to me. So, parents, please don’t do that to your child.
    (2) Some of the so called psychologists will tell you masturbation is a healthy thing. From my experience, its not true. Its as same as you are getting addicted to any other bad habits, like alcohol or drugs. Sooner or later, it would let you down. So, don’t let your emotional strength and spirit to be taken away by those bad habits.

    I feel so happy and relieved after writing this. My true struggle and true life starts today. Thanks God and thanks this website too.

  60. Right now I just read pretty much all of the posts, and I am crying.

    I guess this is the part where I share my life story. Right now I am almost 18.

    My whole life my parents and most of my family have been very religious. I am also constantly surrounded by good friends and church leaders. Despite my background I have been telling myself that I don’t believe in religion and I was becoming more open to things. Honestly I think that I started doing porn out of curiosity and rebellion, because I didn’t want anything to do with my parents religion and people at school talk about it. I’ve only been on it for a couple months, but it feels like its been forever. No one knows that I have been doing this except for myself. My parents have still been making me go to church and I didn’t like it at all. Well a couple days ago I don’t know what has gone over me, but I realized the path that I am headed down to. I thought of how it could affect my life and I don’t want to become like that. Also ever since I started porn, I have been depressed.

    I have been raised a christian and have never really done anything wrong, but I never really believed until I experienced the bad side of life. When I finally became addicted to something I realize how much I need Jesus in my life. The past week I have been becoming super religious. But I was just about to look at porn once again and well, I decided to search how to fix my addiction instead for some crazy reason. Right now I feel much better that I know I would have felt if I had made the wrong decision. I don’t know why I am still rambling on, because my problems are not as crazy as some other people’s problems. By reading everyone else’s posts I am grateful that I am stopping this now as opposed to later.

    Thank you everyone. You all are a great example to other people such as myself.
    I’ll have you all in my prayers.

    -Alan

  61. Im 38 a married christian man and I have struggled with porn all my life,for me I am most vulerable alone in my room or at work surfing the internet.Its a lifelong struggle that makes u feel empty at the end of the sin.It is such an encouragement to know that we are not alone in our struggles to overcome porn.The weakness comes out of loneliness,hurt,pain and the escape from the hardships of daily life.I have quit before but when I bought a galaxy tablet I found myself watching it alot lately.I will pray for Gods forgiveness and do my best to walk away and pray for you all as well.The more we spend time with the Lord we realize that we must do our best to overcome this sin.

  62. I felt compelled to write since there are no female bloggers -

    I felt I was asexual for many years – I was just too wrapped up in kids, career, a struggling marriage & the everyday pressures of life. I had everything a women could want except a healthy sex life. From a womens perspective, all the stars have to align for us to want to have sex cause it means we are truly connnected to our partner. To a man , sex makes the stars align and the world & the relationship ok.

    Then at age 45 & after 20 yrs of marriage I kissed another man and felt alive again !!! The strong feelings of lust & passion were overwhelming. I felt guilty to go further with it so I started watching porn & masterbating as a subsitute. Watching others have sex made me want to engage in an affair. I did have multiple affairs for many years – but just like masterbation & porn, that left me feeling “empty” as well. By working with a skilled addiction counsellor & spending a lot of time on self help, I learned that NO SEXUAL SUBSTITUTE CURES THE EMPTINESS INSIDE.

    I still struggle every day with my addiction to porn, masterbation & affairs. Some days are better than others but it has left me depressed, overweight (food is my sexual substitute) and suseptable to much illness & physical aches n pains. I am a successful women but this problem is VERY DIFFICULT TO OVERCOME ALONE. I would highly recommend this website & it’s suggestions, internet research, & joining a support group.

    I WISH YOU ALL WELL WITH YOUR STRUGGLES & CONGRADULATE YOU ON YOUR STEPS IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION. GOD BLESS

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